The ABC of Understanding Toddler Behavior   by Dr Maud Meates-Dennis

Toddler behavior can be challenging. They don't call it the terrible two's for nothing. It's important as a parent to remember that this is a normal part of child development. From about 18 months of age, a child wants to have his/her whole world at his/her feet. That is normal. It is also normal that you, the parent, will want to teach your child that he/she belongs to a family and he/she has to fit in.

From a management point of view, the principles of toddler discipline and child behavior management are:

• give positive reinforcement for behaviors you want
• ignore behaviors you don't want
• use time-out for "out-of-control" behavior

I often find that parents know the principles but still can't figure out how to change their toddler's behavior. Sometimes, you are just too close to see what is happening.

Using the ABC of Understanding Toddler Behavior you will be able to understand what is really going on for your child and then you will be able to implement the strategies above successfully.

A is for Antecedents - you need to ask yourself "what happens before the behavior?" so, for example, for understanding tantrums what happens before the tantrum.

B is for Behavior - you need to be clear what behavior you are looking at. If your child has a few behaviors you don't want, pick one behavior you want to change and start with that.

C is for Consequence - what happens once the behavior starts. What do you do? What's in it for the child. Usually, the answer will be attention of some kind.

Now, you're armed with all you need. You know what brings the behavior on and what the "reward" for the behavior is. To change the behavior, simply do not reward it in the way you have. Best to try and ignore the behavior.

Further information on dealing with toddler behavior is given at Baby Medical Questions and Answers.

About the Author

Dr Maud is a pediatrician who provides up-to-date health information and practical medical advice for parents of infants and toddlers on her site Baby Medical Questions and Answers